Standing here until you make me move.
by katiebabey1
Summary: A carby feast =)
1. Default Chapter

Title: Standing Here Until You Make Me Move. (part one)  
Summary: It's season 8, and focused on Carter and Abby's Past conversation.  
I have used various lyrics in my fic, I didn't write any of the quoted lyrics unless otherwise noted. I have just simply borrowed them!  
  
"Carter, what are you talking about?" Abby repeated but Carter just stayed there, staring at her, hauntingly. She didn't want to look into his eyes but his glare forced her too.   
  
'I know I've never felt like this before, you're like a drug you got me wanting more.'  
  
Hospital-Next day  
  
Weaver-"come on Malucci, get your ass in gear!" Weaver shrilled, not at all de-motivated by the fact everyone was sleeping on the job.  
Malucci-"Oh come on chief! Give me a break, I've been on all night and I'm off in half an hour!"  
Weaver-"yeah, those are the key words, HALF AN HOUR, so if I don't see you with a patient within the next thirty seconds, you're not going home, understand me?"  
Malucci-"yeah Okay, okay, geez, where's Carter anyway?"   
Weaver-"I don't know, he's not answering his phone." Weaver finished simply, her tone dropping and face cursing as she set eyes on Abby, who had heard the last part of the conversation.  
  
'With one light on, in one room, I know you're up when I get home.'  
  
Abby pulled her coat on and sighed, she was really worried about Carter. She hadn't spoken to him since his outburst yesterday, and she felt bad, for not reacting and giving Carter piece of mind, but she froze. She stepped out of the lobby slowly. It was snowing again. What a surprise. She was going to go to Carter's apartment; she had to make sure he was okay. She didn't want another sleepless night  
  
She walked up the stairs slowly, rehearsing a little speech in he mind, but knowing it would go to pieces as soon as he opened the door. For a minute she wanted to turn around, to maybe try calling instead. But no. Why was she so nervous? This was Carter! Why were things suddenly so different?  
  
She knocked on the door softly, half hoping he wouldn't hear it so she could just go home and keep telling herself she had tried.  
  
'She's never gonna be like the one before, she read it in her stars that there's something more'  
  
Carter answered.  
  
Abby-"ahh hi, can I come in?" She promised herself she wouldn't ask that. But Carter was looking at her in a way that made her feel guilty every time. She felt guilty because every time he looked at her in this way, it made her wish she were with him and not Luka.  
Carter-"Sure."  
Abby-"I had this whole speech planned out, but it's totally gone from my head"  
Carter-"then why don't you just go with your instincts?"  
Abby-"Because I don't cheat on people."  
  
'Know that it's bound to be a heartbreak situation.'  
  
To be continued!  
Any feedback would be appreciated!  



	2. Standing here until you make me move. Pa...

Title: Standing Here Until You Make Me Move. (Part two)   
By Kate  
Summer_hunnie@hotmail.com   
  
  
**  
  
Previously- Abby-"I had this whole speech planned out, but it's totally gone from my head"  
Carter-"then why don't you just go with your instincts?"  
Abby-"Because I don't cheat on people."  
  
**  
  
Continuing from Carters apartment  
  
Carter-"What's that supposed to mean?" Carter whispered trying to be gentle and quiet, praying that he wouldn't wake Abby from the trance she had put herself in.  
Abby-"You know what? I don't know, I'm going to go." She said smiling slightly as she stood up, trying not to faint from the head rush. Carter looked surprised and stood up with her.  
Carter-"I'm sorry, you don't have to go you know."  
Abby-"Yes, yes I do." And with that Abby let herself out. She ran down the stairs feeling the tears welling in her eyes, stinging, and aching. What had she gotten herself into? She didn't know where to go, or what to say. She wanted to run to the hospital, hold Luka, hold somebody. She wanted to cry and scream and tell someone what she was feeling, but the only person she had ever cried in front of was gone. The only person she had ever trusted enough to see her so vulnerable had betrayed her.  
  
The night seemed to go on forever. She used the grey, rusty pay phone to check her messages. 3 new messages. She listened carefully.  
  
1) Hey Abby it's me, Luka, pick up! Okay well anyway, I'm going to be late; Romano's making me take a double shift. I'll call you later.  
2) Abby, pick up. Come on Abby, it's me john, call me back, ok?  
3) Abby, are you there? It's Luka, pick up, I'm worried, Carter just rang and asked if you were at the hospital. Where are you?  
  
Abby cursed and lit another cigarette, her 5th this evening, she was meant to be giving up. Why was it she didn't have any freedom anymore? Why was it that she couldn't go for a walk or stay out late without people getting worried? And everything about Luka annoyed her lately. Everything right down to the sound of his voice. God. She wondered what was happening to her. She knew she wanted the old Abby back, and there was only 1 way to do this.   
  
'Funny how one can learn to grow numb to the madness, block it away, leave the worst unsaid'  
  
Hospital  
  
Luka-"Abby where have you been? I've been worried sick!"  
Abby-"can we talk?"  
Luka-"ahh sure, may I ask what about?"  
Abby-"I'll meet you at Doc magoos in 5?  
Luka-"Okay..." He wanted to ask more questions but she had walked off before he had the chance. He wanted to follow, but he knew not to, Abby couldn't be rushed.  
  
Abby sat down, she didn't order, she didn't plan on staying long. She did however light a cigarette. She was startled when Luka approached her, brushing her cheek softly with the palm of his hand. She quickly stubbed out her cigarette and turned to face him, tears once again welling behind her strong, brown eyes.  
  
Luka-"Abby, what is this about? You've been distant for days."  
Abby-"I'm leaving. Not all together, but for a few weeks."  
Luka-"What?!"  
Abby-"I'm going to see my mom, try and help her some more, and I don't think it's right to keep doing this to you again and again."  
Luka-"You've helped your mother all you can, you don't need to go back there."  
Abby-"Luka, it's over." She said gently, smiling and knowing this is something that any girl would regret. "It's got to be about me for a while, I can't worry about someone else all the time. I've got to have time on my own, you understand?"  
Luka-"I understand that you won't let me help you." Luka walked away. Frustration in his walk, but Abby didn't feel as bad as she thought she would.  
  
'It's alright to do the wrong thing, for the right reasons.'  
  
The lack of sleep was finally catching up with her. The night before was still playing on her mind, but she couldn't let it rest. Not until she had sorted it out. Of course she wasn't really going to see her mother, which was the last thing she wanted to do right now. She was going to Florence. She had been there before, just after her divorce, and it had done her the world of good. Abby sat in silence as she absently wondered whether that was something she had gotten from her mother. The way she would escape every now and then when things got too much. It didn't matter. But she had to go. Now.  
  
Abby hadn't returned Carter's call, and things had been bitter between them for days, things between her and Luka were even worse. She was on her way to the hospital to collect some things from her locker. Her passport for one, which had always seemed bizarrely safer at work that at home. Her garage keys and other stuff, which she would need. She took a deep breath and stepped into the lobby, holding a large bag with which to carry her stuff. She didn't really want to face anyone so she went straight into the lounge, trying to conceal her face with the black cloud she could have sworn was following her. She breathed a sigh of relief as she pushed open the lounge door violently. Not noticing Dave sat in the corner quietly.  
"Going somewhere?" He said inquisitively, with a 'busted' grin on his face.  
"Just taking a long vacation" she snapped back, not wishing to elaborate.  
"Oh really! Where you off to?"   
"Ahh...Florence, just for a break."  
"Well don't do anything I wouldn't do" Dave added before leaving to the sound of his pager humming 'I'll keep that in mind' Abby hushed under her breath.  
  
'How can I just let you walk away, just let you leave without a trace.'  
  
She lifted the large, brown bag. She'd always hated that bag. She opened the door again taking a deep breath as though as soon as she stepped out into the busy lobby she would not be able to breath, would be drowning. She quickened her pace, she could see the door coming closer, closer. BANG! Of all the people in this hospital she had to walk right into Carter. Great. She furiously scrambled to the floor trying to pick up her passport which had flung itself out, as if it had an evil mind of it's own.  
  
"You going somewhere?" Carter asked, looking Abby straight in the eyes. He hadn't done this for a while. And Abby had forgotten to breathe and all she wanted to do was...-  
"Ahh yeah, just taking a holiday." She smiled back trying not to look straight back into his.  
"When you getting back?" Carter asked trying to sound absent, but instead sounding neurotic. He saw Abby smile at this as she stood up.  
"I don't think I am." She finished simply, smiling. She didn't want to smile though. She wanted to cry. To pull him close and cry into his shirt, and he would hold her and tell her everything was all right. Abby touched Carter's shoulder tenderly, smoothing his white-lab coat before looking up one last time. As if this was the end and she was savouring everything, every moment. She turned around and walked away. Feeling empowered.  
  
There were a million questions he wanted to ask, a million things he wanted to do. Should he run after her? He didn't even know where she was going. What about her career? What about them? But he froze. All he could do was watch Abby walk away. Her brown hair waving slightly. She stopped. She looked back one time, and then quickly stopped herself. She wasn't coming back.  
  
TO BE CONTINUED!!  
  



	3. Standing here until you make me move. Pa...

Title: Standing Here Until You Make Me Move. (Part three)  
By Katiebabey.  
  
  
Previously:  
She stopped. She looked back one time, and then quickly stopped herself. She wasn't coming back.  
  
  
  
Time seemed to freeze as Carter turned around to face the plaster pillar, and the only thing saving him from a certain fall. Carter wished time would actually freeze, then he could have time to think and when he turned around Abby would still be there. Her hair would still be humming and he would be able to catch her, or watch her leave-whatever. But when he turned around she wasn't there, infact time had not frozen and he wasn't sure how long he'd been stood there.  
  
'I wish I could just make you turn around, turn around and see my cry. There's so much I have to say to you, so many reasons why.'  
  
Airport  
  
"Is anyone sat here?" Said a clumsy looking teenager. She was pretty Abby thought, if not a little sad.  
"No, sure" Abby replied moving her stuff casually from the seat. One look at the girl's red, puffy eyes was enough to free Abby of her current concerns. "A runaway huh?" Abby said not really expecting an answer.  
"Pretty much, I'm going to Italy to be with my boyfriend."  
"Wow me too, except I have no boyfriend there, just going!" She said trying to make sense herself of what she just said.  
"Aren't you a little old to be running away?" the girl hushed innocently.  
"You're never to old to have problems and I guess you're never to old to runaway from them, listen, won't anyone miss you?" Abby whispered, concern in her tone.  
"Not a soul. How about you?"  
"Maybe one or two" Abby confided.  
"Then why are you leaving? I'm leaving because there's no one for me here, if someone's going to miss you, maybe you should stay."  
"Well, I haven't really decided whether I'm coming back or not yet." Abby replied passively.  
"You're waiting for that guy to show up huh?" the girl said noticing Abby's painful features.  
"What? No, nobody even knows I'm here"  
"Oh" replied the girl simply. They both sat in silence, venturing into their thoughts.  
  
Abby heard her name. She thought she was imagining it and stayed still going through the past few days in her mind. She suddenly looked up and blinked as she saw Carter. 'ABBY' he bellowed trying wake her from her self-induced coma.  
"How did you find me?"  
"Something Dave said."  
"Oh" Abby whispered paralysed from the neck down.  
"Look, I came here to ask you not to go" He said, bearing the reserve of a friend, but the plea of a lover.  
"No, I have to go Carter"  
"But what about med-school? What about Luka? What about county?" Carter pleaded.  
"I just need a break." She said, still hating that she had to justify herself to people.  
"Fine, but you have to come back" Carter said anxious and aggressive.   
"Yeah?" Abby said playfully almost laughing at how she really didn't. "And why exactly is that Carter?" She said thinking he would not answer.  
"Because I need you here" he replied simply.  
  
Abby had made up her mind, she was going. She had to go, if only for a week, it was what she needed right now.  
"I'm going Carter" she said, she reached up and kissed his cheek lightly "thank you for coming here, it means a lot to me" she stuttered holding back the tears. "And I promise I'll be back...soon" Abby wanted to take that back as soon as she said it. But the fantasy of running away was turning into reality. She turned and made her way to the plane. Reminding herself to breathe as Carter did the same.  
  
5 weeks later  
  
Abby had been gone over a month. She had called Luka in the first week, but nobody had heard from her since. The gossip had long faded and no one really expected her back.   
  
Kerry-"Carter, have you heard from Abby?" Kerry asked curiously.  
"No, I haven't, why, is there a problem?"  
"She called me last night, she's home, coming back to work next week, just thought you should know." She shrilled, smiling at Carter's sudden intensity.  
"Oh right" Carter said trying not to care too much.  
  
'And then you walked in the room, and I was twisted in the web of desire for you.'  
  
Carter knocked on Abby's door lightly, nervous and fidgeting for a reason he couldn't explain.  
  
Abby opened the door. Carter couldn't believe it. Abby looked fantastic. Skin was glowing, with a perfect bronze tan and her hair was different too. It had grown longer and looked so shiny and perfect. He didn't know what to say, she looked so great; he melted and couldn't speak. So they looked at each other, in a comforting silence that lasted a long time. Both too frightened to speak unless they ruined it some how...  
  
TO BE CONTINUED...  
  
Feedback would be deeply appreciated!   



	4. Standing here until you make me move. Pa...

Title: Standing Here Until You Make Me Move. (Part four)  
  
Songs: I have used various lyrics in my fic, I didn't write any of the quoted lyrics unless otherwise noted. I have just simply borrowed them!  
Previously:  
Abby opened the door. Carter couldn't believe it. Abby looked fantastic. Skin was glowing, with a perfect bronze tan and her hair was different too. It had grown longer and looked so shiny and perfect. He didn't know what to say, she looked so great; he melted and couldn't speak. So they looked at each other, in a comforting silence that lasted a long time. Both too frightened to speak unless they ruined it some how...   
'Every time you smile I see the light, and every time I close my eyes, I realise'  
Abby smiled at John awkwardly, yet showing signs of affection and knowingly forced Carter to speak.  
"Wow, you look...great!"  
"Thanks, like I said a really needed that break."  
"I guess...so have you called Luka?"  
"No, why would I?" Abby said, she had broken up with Luka about 2 months ago.  
"Well I mean..."  
"Ohh, you didn't know, me and Luka broke up, about 2 months ago."  
"Oh, no I didn't know, I'm sorry"  
"Don't be, needed to end sometime I guess"  
"Yeah." Carter finished not quite knowing what to say. Trying not to look into Abby's eyes for fear of falling over.  
"So you wanna come in or something?" Abby asked a little chuckle in her voice, she'd never seen Carter look so nervous. Although Abby had had her break to concentrate on herself for a while, she had spent most of the time thinking about Carter, those last words bounced off her brain over and over again. 'And I don't want to be your friend' what had he meant by that? How could he have meant relationship? She was still seeing Luka at the time. And if he didn't want to be her friend why was he at her door now?  
"Look Carter, I thought 'you didn't want to be my friend or whatever" As soon as she said it she regretted it. Why had she said it? Yes she wanted to know, but was he willing to answer?  
'Please remember, please remember, I was there for you and you were there for me, please remember, our time together, remember me'  
  
"I don't" Carter said coyly, looking down at his shoes and then finally into Abby's eyes, he saw the confusion which made him laugh. She was so naive, so unaware that he had feelings for her. He smiled, amused as he looked into her eyes.  
"What, what are you looking at?" She asked, smiling back, yet suddenly insecure.  
"You" he finished laughing louder. It wasn't her fault. He hadn't been crystal clear. But he didn't want to be; he was too worried that what he wanted wasn't the same as what she wanted. That if he took this one step further he could risk loosing the most beautiful, understanding, smart, loyal and kind friend he had ever had, that he could hurt the one person he never wanted to hurt.  
"Look Carter I don't understand. If you don't want to be my friend, then why are you..."Abby didn't get a chance to finish. Carter took her face firmly in his hands and kissed her gently. Brushing away her shiny hair from her face with his fingers. At first she was tense but she didn't pull away. It lasted. The adrenaline pumping through both their bodies was incredible. Abby had not expected this, but at the same time didn't stop. But Carter had to, he had to look at her face and listen to her voice and touch her, he had to check for some kind of reaction. He stopped and looked at her. She smiled awkwardly, not quite knowing what to say.  
"I'm sorry" Carter whispered, he started to stutter and try to explain himself muttering, his eyes darting around the room, unable to look at Abby; he feared if he looked at her again, he would make the same mistakes all over again.  
"It's okay" She said, "A little unexpected, but okay"  
"Okay?" Carter said wondering what in the hell ok had actually ever meant. He tried to race his mind back the last time that he had said ok. Tried to remember what he had meant when he said it, trying to complete a definition in his head.  
"Look, John" She had gone to say Carter, but do you call someone who has just kissed you by their surname? Abby started to wonder in frenzy before getting to the point. "I just got back, and I'm not sure I can do this right now." Carter looked blank, as if he was fighting not to let the emotions through.  
"Well I said I was sorry" Carter said trailing off. He wanted to run off into the night and never be seen again but Abby's gaze had him paralysed. "What are you thinking?" he asked, wondering why she was looking at him in such a way.  
"Actually, I'm thinking this" She said quietly as she reached for Carter's hand. He looked down at his hand then back at Abby as she did the same. Their eyes were fixed on each other for the longest four seconds of their lives as Abby squeezed Carter's hand just before reaching up to his lips and returning the kiss that had felt so safe. So normal. So nice. It was gentle at first and soft, and then as it grew more passionate Carter reluctantly pulled away.  
"I thought you didn't want this" Carter said feeling Abby's grip tighten.  
"I've missed out on a lot of things in my life john, sat out a lot of happiness because I was too scared. I used to blame it on my mom, but going to Italy made me realise I was always too angry with her. I convinced myself that if she vanished all my problems would go along with her, but I was just hiding behind her, sure it was hard, but it was always worth it for the good times. I don't want to miss out on anything else. I want to give myself the chance to be happy. I want to give us the chance to be happy." She finished, feeling open and judged. Carter did not know what to say; what could he possibly say to tell her how he felt. His mind went blank. He moved his hands around her face and held them there for a second, he looked into her eyes, watching the tears well, and he kissed her. The world seemed to spin outside them, they were the only ones who existed right now, right there in a moment which would be over in a second, but last the rest of their lives.   
  
Abby awoke the next morning abruptly. She felt strange. She moved her leg and hit something. Something that wasn't normally there, she lifted her head confused and looked. It was Carter. Suddenly the whole night came back to her. The kiss, the happiness, and the way she felt so safe. She replaced her head gently back on to the pillow, trying not to wake Carter, not wanting to have to get up and not feel him next to her, she drifted off to sleep.  
  
Carter carefully manoeuvred himself around Abby's sleeping body. He smiled happily as her watched her chest rise and fall and her skin shimmer lightly in the strong sunlight of morning. He made his way into the kitchen to make himself a coffee. As he did the phone rang. Carter picked it up immediately still not wanting to wake Abby.  
"Hello"  
"Hello, could I speak with an Abby Lockhart please?"  
"Ahh she's actually asleep at the moment, could I take a message?"  
"Yeah, could you just tell her she got the job?"  
"What job?"  
"The job she applied for, OB nurse? Florida?"  
"OB nurse, Florida...right ok, I will" Carter put down the phone and stared at it in disbelief for a moment. What was going on? She was leaving, applying for jobs? Suddenly Abby stepped out from the bedroom unsteadily.  
"Who was that?" She said innocently. Carter stared at her for a moment not quite knowing what to say, not really wanting to tell her; his face looked angry and disappointed. He opened his mouth to tell her and just waited for the sound to come out, but it didn't...  
  



	5. Standing here until you make me move. Pa...

Title: Standing Here Until You Make Me Move. (Part four)   
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   
Previously:   
  
"OB nurse, Florida...right ok, I will" Carter put down the phone and stared at it in disbelief for a moment. What was going on? She was leaving, applying for jobs?   
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   
  
The question Abby had asked was still hanging in the air. Who was it? She had asked.   
"It was Florida" Carter stumbled.   
"Florida?" Abby laughed.   
"I mean, you've got the job you applied for"   
"Oh" Abby's grin was soon wiped off of her face. Carter looked at his feet, unable to deal with the confrontation that was coming. Why was his life the cruel prison it always seemed to be? That would allow him a couple of hours of happiness before snatching it away again, and making him pay a fine.   
"I applied for the job before any of this happened." Her eyes darted around the room, fixating on her shirt and various other garments, which had been thrown all over the floor. "I applied for it after me and Luka...things are different now." She finished moving towards him, she tried to get close but he pulled away. She tried to touch him but he winced. She looked down once again and walked away.   
"Take the job," Carter announced as she walked away; she stopped abruptly, not looking back for a second, trying to register his harsh, angry words.   
"What?" She asked in disbelief; her tone hurt but her volume rose.   
"Take the god damn job Abby. Go to your little hide away. I mean this probably wouldn't have worked anyway."   
"Why are you saying these things?" She asked, hurt and confused. She tried not to let it show, it was so out of character for her.   
"Because, has it ever crossed your mind for one minute that from the day I told you I didn't want to be your friend I thought of nothing else. That I tortured myself day and night thinking about you. That thinking about you, no matter how painful, made me think about drugs less. I thought of nothing else Abby, and after breaking up with Luka and then last night, I foolishly began to think that you might have felt the same way-"   
"I did-"   
"Oh, but you just applied for jobs miles away-"   
"I did that because, because it meant that if this didn't happen, if I was too late, I wouldn't have to put myself through it. That I would have something else to look forward to. Something to soak up some of the emptiness I felt. A fresh start, that is the reason" She stopped, feeling fully justified and looked up at Carter, pleading with her eyes for a response. Carter gently smoothed Abby's face with his hand but pulled away, as if frightened if he got too close he would hurt her. He then walked away. It seemed there was always an obstacle in their way. Always something that didn't let them finish what they had started and today was no exception. Abby stayed still for a moment, eyes stretching across her apartment, she could still smell Carter. She started to clean up, and erase every piece of evidence that could suggest the night they shared could end so badly.   
  
Hospital


	6. Standing here until you make me move. Pa...

Title: Home (Part 6) Final Part. (Standing here until you make me move)   
Author: Kate.- Summer_hunnie@hotmail.com   
Author's notes: Feedback would be cool!   
  
  
******   
Previously:   
"You want Florida?" Carter asked. Not looking into her eyes, instead focusing on his rogue shoelace.   
"Maybe..." Abby hummed.   
"Then go." Carter finished.   
"John-"   
"-GO!" Carter called back, throwing his anger in his stride.   
  
Abby thought about chasing after him, but what was the use? Maybe she did want Florida, and maybe Carter was right about how she should not sacrifice her career for something that probably wouldn't work out anyway.   
  
'You just laughed and smiled, denied the proof; we're fine until I think of a problem. I wish it made sense, like a joke that no one gets, it's a life without regret, I wanna feel this way forever and ever.'   
  
Abby took a deep breath and walked into the hospital, not wanting a lot of attention, just wanting closure.   
  
"Abby, Abby, over here!" Abby turned slightly alarmed by the urgency in Dave's voice. He was holding a big bunch of flowers and a card, which had been signed by all the staff. Abby smiled a warm smile, she never thought she'd be sorry to see the back of Dave but she was. She opened the card, constantly being distracted by the calls of encouragement from nurses and other Doctors, to busy to say goodbye properly. She laughed at the card; they'd managed to squeeze nearly every single person that worked at the hospital onto it. Abby walked into the lounge to empty the locker that should have been emptied long ago, thanks to her medical school suspension. But nobody had noticed so she kept on using it. At that same moment Luka too walked into the lounge.   
  
"I'm going to miss you Abby." He said smiling at her.   
"I'm going to miss you too" She replied simply. And that was the truth, she had loved Luka, they had had some great times, and as she hugged him warmly and comfortably she still felt the security of his hold, which had first attracted her. She let go unwillingly, but desperate to move on.   
"Goodbye Abby" Luka said as he exited the lounge. Abby smiled, some things were better left unsaid. Minutes later she too ventured out into the hospital struggling with bags to take to her car.   
"Hey let me help you with those." Dave said as he took them from her hands and carried them out to the car.   
"Good luck Abby" Dr Greene managed on his way past. "We're really going to miss you here" He smiled sincerely before stepping into the lift.   
"I'll second that! Goodbye Abby" Dr Weaver added on her way past, presumably on the way to the same trauma. Abby just smiled unwilling to say goodbye. She had never liked to say something so final. With her mom it had been easy, after all, she would always be back, but in the real world, it was much harder to say. She walked out of the hospital stopping and looking back just once. She saw Carter and he looked straight into her eyes, she quickly turned though. Turned and walked away; the messages, plans and plane times flashing through her mind. Carter had wanted to run after her, but he would have been setting himself up for a fall. She was leaving and he would just have to deal. Things would work out, they always did.   
  
'Anybody heading in my direction, away from the city, anybody want to change the way they feel? Step inside. Doesn't really matter where you wanna take me, away from the city. I wanna start again, I wanna take it back I wanna start again.'   
  
Abby got to the airport. She smiled as she remembered Carter had asked her to stay the last time she was here. She knew that wouldn't happen this time. That he'd asked her to stay and she'd said no. That thought sent shivers down her spine. When she'd gone to Italy it was fine, there was hope and she knew it. Even though she told herself not to hang on to the notion of it when she got back, she did. But now, there was nothing to go back to. No hope for the future, only regrets from the past. Abby froze. She heard the last call for her plane and took a step back. Everything was in slow motion, her eyesight went hazy and she thought she was going to faint. This was the beginning of everything else. She took a few deep breaths for a moment and closed her eyes. She cleared her mind of any thoughts and when she opened her eyes again she was walking. Walking fast and harsh. But she wasn't walking towards the plane, she was walking away from it. Home.   
  
'I got my ticket. And I got a straight road. But I'm passing the same signs. Over and over. But my world falls down, and I'm there calling out, and it's something I can't say; though it seems the only way. But it's a game that I won't play. Not today.'   
  
Abby surprised herself. She was being calm under pressure. Something else had kicked in. She let her instincts guide her. She soon found herself back at county, but one look at the hospital told her she wouldn't find what she was looking for in there. Ironically there was no cure to her problem in a place that had solved the rest.   
  
~~~~~~~Cut to John Carter~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   
Carter had been miserable all day. He hated the fact that he had not been enough to make her stay. He hated the fact that he would have stayed for her in a second, yet she had gone to Florida disregarding every feeling she did or did not have for him. But most of all he hated, despised and dreaded the fact that he'd never know. Neither would she. And there were two things in life, which could happen and have you tossing and turning in your bed for the rest of your life. 1) Having regrets 2) having to live your life not knowing how something could have ended up when you know it could have been something good. These were two things he had learned, both from being an addict and being human.   
  
'Why, bleeding is breathing, you're hiding underneath the smoke in the room. Try, bleeding is believing, I saw you crawling to the door.'   
  
Carter sat still in the booth that he had always sat in at Doc Magoo's. Staring at the ashtray as though it had all the answers. Everything was playing like a film without sound. He looked out the window and cursed at himself. This must have been the 6th time today he had mistaken someone else for Abby. He made himself turn away and hit his head with his hand hard.   
  
'Where it go? The bluebird I should follow back home. But where is home? Guess it won't amount to much. Won't be long before I crush. I'll stand in line.'   
  
Abby walked into Doc Magoo's. She carefully manoeuvred herself around the tables contending with the luggage she didn't think to drop off. If Carter was there, she knew where he'd be. In that same booth. It was no use; she was never going to fit. She took a de-tour to the bar and parked her luggage down aimlessly. She looked behind her for a minute, forgetting the rather vital reason for her backward journey, but she had to take a double take. There he was. He was sat there looking at her as if she wasn't really there. He was surprised; she could see it in his eyes. She took a deep, silent breath and headed towards him. He slowly stood up, smiling sincerely. They were standing face to face.   
"Are you really here?" Carter asked dumbly.   
"I couldn't leave, I don't want t run away." Carter stroked Abby's cheek gently before kissing her passionately. And as they kissed Abby felt his hand through her hair. She had always loved that. She felt like this was where she was meant to be. This was right. This was safe. This was home.   
  
  
Wow! Well after 6 parts I've finally finished! I'm thinking of doing another series, which follows on from this one focusing on the relationshippy bit, but I'm not sure.   
Well thanks for everyone's support, and feedback will still be great! =)


End file.
